Bengal Tiger Victim of Racial Abuse in Melbourne Zoo

In yet another disgraceful example of racially charged assaults in Australia, a Bengal Tiger (of Indian origin) has now been attacked in a zoo. When early reports of the incident spread, the Bengal Tiger was suspected to have been Saurav Ganguly. However, it has now been ascertained that it was indeed a real tiger; a tiger that must now have given up dreams of having the wind in his mane and hopping along with Kangaroos in the Australian Outback.

Sher Khan, 18, was returning to his cage late thursday evening when two caucasian males and a koala bear ambushed him. Later inspection of security cameras reveal that the so-called bear was hurled at the tiger from close proximity. The koala, which appears to have been specifically trained for such an assult, then proceeded to pull out the tiger's whiskers one by one. While the tiger was thus demoralised, the youth approached him with spray paint and drew yellow and black stripes on him. That the tiger was already yellow with black stripes does not seem to have deterred them at all from indulging in tiger graffiti. This, we have deemed to be extremely racist. Experts comment that stripes of these specific colours have been chosen to target the Chinese and the Africans. Evidently, the aussies are now keen to warn away not just the Indians, but people of all other races as well.

According to zoo keeper Shane Kuttappan , the attack was cold blooded and inhuman. He goes on to say that the koala in question has a history of intolerenace. The previous year, he had gone so far as to chop off the fluffy black ears of a Chinese Panda and wear them as mittens. Unfortunately, the Koala is now in hiding and is unavailable for comment. Inset, is the picture of this vicious creature. Readers who have information on its whereabouts are requested to contact Australian cricket captain Ricky Ponting, who has taken personal responsibility for the attack. (God knows why).



Meanwhile, two Indian students are learned to have kidnapped a Zebra from the same zoo. This appears to have been done in retaliation, as they left a mysterious note with the words 'If Kevin Rudd doesnt make Australia safe for Indians, we will paint this Jeebra black and white and play tic-tac-toe on him'. What they were thinking is unclear at this point. As the Zebra isnt even native to Australia, the only conclusion one can draw is that they are just plain dumb.